Fostering Compassionate Relationships Post-Election

An opinion article by Associate Vice Chancellor for Health Equity, Diversity and Inclusion at UC Davis Health Dr. Hendry Ton.

The past few months leading up to the election have been intense for many people who collectively experience a wide span of feelings about the outcomes—both the outcomes that we know, and those that are yet to be determined. The recent elections results brought with them a broad and mixed range of responses within our politically diverse region ranging from deepened anxiety and despair to excitement and hope. These feelings are reflected in our patients, colleagues and communities. 

It is important that we respect this diversity of responses because this is democracy in action. I think this is also a time for us to be mindful and sensitive to people who are struggling or could benefit from additional support. Some people have shared concerns about the future of their reproductive health and minoritized groups, including people within the LGBTQ+ community, may be under added emotional stress due to fears of losing basic civil and health rights.

Despite the differences in our response to the elections, each of us started our days prior to the election with the intent to do good in the world through our work at UC Davis. The UC Davis Principles of Community and the UC Davis Health Believe in Better Campaign exemplifies this aspiration. Post-election, this remains true. We continue this good work together and by using a trauma informed approach to compassionately bridge our differences, we can heal as a community.

In my previous article, I explored the impact of trauma and the way it shapes how we think and relate to one another. I also reviewed ways in which we can manage our own trauma mindset. In this article, I would like to review how to take a trauma-informed approach in our interactions with others to help guide us in fostering compassionate relationships with others in this post-election season. The core aspect of this approach is creating safety, which you can foster through the following strategies:

• Listen actively, showing genuine interest.
• Set boundaries together by discussing what topics may feel too sensitive or activating to discuss and agree to respect those boundaries.
• Even with clear communication about boundaries, there may be topics may come up that neither you nor your colleague(s) expect to be activating but realize during the conversation that they are triggering. Compassionately give each other permission to table a particularly difficult topic if they emerge.
• Recognize that the physical and social environment influences how we engage with one another (i.e., it may be difficult to have a sensitive discussion in a public space, or when one is feeling physically uncomfortable.)
• Avoid minimizing your colleague’s experience. What may seem small to one person can be very significant to another person. Refrain from states such as “it’s not that bad” or “if it were me I would just…”.  Instead, you can acknowledge how your colleague is feeling without internalizing their feelings of trauma by using statements such as “that sounds really hard.”

Enhancing your relationships with a trauma-informed approach involves creating balanced spaces where both you and others feel safe to express yourselves while honoring each other’s emotional limits and boundaries. With time and practice, you can build connections that are resilient, compassionate and rooted in mutual respect.

Remember, this approach benefits not only the people you interact with, but also your own well-being. By creating relationships grounded in understanding and compassion, you contribute to a healthier and more supportive community. I would like to close with an excerpt from the UC Davis Health Believe in Better principles, which I find to be timelier than ever:

Now is the time for better.
Building a better future where we all come together for a common goal — to transform lives.
Because we believe every person deserves access to health care and to be well.
We believe in delivering tomorrow’s health care today, with kindness, trust and inclusion.
We believe in pushing forward — to find the next cure, to solve the next problem.

For our patients.
For our employees (including faculty and trainees).
For us all.

Hendry Ton is associate vice chancellor for Health Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion and clinical professor of psychiatry at UC Davis Health

The opinions on this page represent the views of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of the University of California, UC Davis or the Chancellor of UC Davis.

For related content, read Dr. Hendry Ton’s previous article on psychological safety.